Have you ever experienced a situation where you were having an argument with someone because you knew you were right? How was that for you? Did the argument escalate? Are you still friends with that person? Have you since lost touch with that person?
Let’s explore the concept of righteousness and wrongness.
What is Righteousness?
The dictionary defines ‘righteousness’ as the quality or state of being just or rightful. It can also have the connotation that the person has been ‘judged’ or ‘reckoned’ as leading a life that is pleasing to the god/s portrayed in these religious belief systems.
From my observations, the actual effect of righteousness is that the person is so stuck in his/her point of view that nothing can shift it. It’s, as if, the person has given up their entire being for this point of view. Whether it be a right or wrong point view, does not matter. Now, is it the person’s actual point of view or is it a bought point of view? More often than not, you’ll find that it is a bought point of view.
When you ask someone who is being righteous about whether it is their point of view, they always reply, “yes”. Asking further about where did they get that point of view, it’ll be from family, friends or a book. Mind you, though, most people won’t let you get that far. They will stick with the rightness of their point of view and that’s that. They won’t look at where they got their point of view.
What is Self-Righteousness?
Self-righteousness is defined as (also called sanctimoniousness, sententiousness, and holier-than-thou attitudes) is defined as a feeling or display of (usually smug) moral superiority derived from a sense that one’s beliefs, actions, or affiliations are of greater virtue than those of the average person. Self-righteous individuals are often intolerant of the opinions and behaviors of others.
I’m not aware of anyone that hasn’t done this at some point in their life, myself included. It’s an attitude that disregards all other points of view in favour of the person’s point of view. Unfortunately, its not a favourable quality.
Like righteousness, if you ask where the person got that point of view, they will stick to their guns saying it is their point of view. But, again, you won’t get very far.
The Wrongness of Righteousness
I’ve titled this section the wrongness of righteousness. Its not so much that its a wrongness, its merely a choice that people are making that does not allow them to see another’s point of view. From a conscious point of view, there is absolutely nothing wrong with righteousness, it’s just a choice. If that choice is working for you, then fine. If it’s not working for you (ie. you’re not getting what you’d like in life because of the righteousness), perhaps it is time to reconsider.
What is Wrongness?
Wrongness is where you, as an individual, see yourself as perpetually wrong. No matter what you do, you feel that you’re wrong. In the presence of righteous individual, you’re always going to be wrong. Both Eri and I have experienced this sense of wrongness most of our lives. It’s created a lot of difficulties for the both of us. However, through the use of the Access Consciousness® tools, we’ve been able to overcome it.
The Wrong Tool
If you’re having a disagreement with someone who is being righteous, then one of the easiest ways to move on is to tell them that they are right. Really, that’s all they are interested in anyway. In this sense, there is a rightness in being wrong.
The rightness of being wrong is where you state that you’re wrong and that the other person is right. This has the effect of the other person coming off their righteous point of view and allows both of you to move on from the situation. It does not mean that you are wrong, it simply allows both of you to have a new possibility.
You are not making yourself wrong or going down the path of wrongness here; you are merely stating that you’re wrong so that you can move on from the situation.
Below are some free audio associated with the rightness of being wrong:
You can also download these processes for your later use.
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